December 17, 2017

Weather Vane (6)


I've posted chapter 6 of "Weather Vane." This chapter concludes the short story collection. Still waiting for news about Fuyumi Ono's upcoming novel.

The occasionally hot "cold war" between Baku Province and the Imperial Government, documented in A Thousand Leagues of Wind, began when Koukan, the province lord of Baku, rejected the claims of the pretender.

Youko allied herself with his men to overthrow the corrupt governor of Wa Province. She later appointed Koukan as Chousai of the Imperial Court.

Labels: ,

Comments:

# posted by Blogger nene
Thank you so much for your translations. These stories are simply beautiful. I really like the way they add small bits of information, enlarging our understanding of the world of the Twelve Kingdoms and the Way of Heaven.

I compiled a list of typos and unclear points for each chapter; the page numbers correspond to the closest page below the text.

Chap I:

p.291: " There was nothing to see anyway, so kept her eyes tightly shut. "
Should be: so _she_ kept

p.292: " They could hardly claim it wasn’t inconvenient "
A personal note here - it took me three or four readings to understand what was the intended meaning of the double negative. Why not simply use "They could hardly claim it was convenient" ?

p.293: " “I should have stayed with my mother and sister,” she said. "
This is Meishu speaking. I wonder about this line, since the only family members mentioned above are her father, brother, and grandfather.

p.295: " found her floating in a nearby canal "
p.295: " the old grandmother grieved "
In both cases, missing a full stop at the end of the sentence.


Chap II

p.299: " More likely he took her on because he felt sorry for her. One morning she as much to Choukou. "
Should be: she _said_ as much

p.299: " have no desire to indulge themselves when to come to food or clothing. "
Should be: when _it comes_ to food

p.313: " No end of find details filled the almanac, "
Should be: no end of _fine_ details


Chap IV
p. 322: " Shikyou and Seihaku and Kakei also traveled back and forth to on a regular basis. "
Shouldn't that be: back and forth _on_ a regular basis, without "to"?

p.325: " “Is where the buried treasure is?” "
Should be: is _that_ where

p.327: "Wild birds seize them in the beaks, and which spawn the eggs that give birth to the chicks. "
Is "which" correct here? Shouldn't that be "hence", or "whence", or similar?

Chap V

pp.341: " \c\c "
Runaway line break command?

p.342: "She’d have a hard time living any kind of a life if she couldn’t work here"
Missing a full stop.

Chap VI

p.344: "\c\c"

p.349: "They are proclaiming it to the world"
Missing a full stop.



12/19/2017 3:46 PM
 

# posted by Blogger Eugene
Thanks for the editing pass! I think I fixed all the typos you caught. I rewrote the paragraph at the end of page 292, though it is about Meishu's mother and (older) sister.
12/19/2017 8:38 PM
 

# posted by Anonymous Mike
Thank you so much for translating these short stories! Both collections are really wonderful reads, and most of us would have never experienced them without you. I saw your comment that you plan to translate the upcoming book too, which is amazing news (let's hope it's out this year)!

I commend o6asan for putting in the effort years ago, but his English is pretty difficult to understand and enjoy. As far as I know, Hyouhaku is the only remaining story that only he translated. Do you plan to eventually translate it too? If so, I think it would mean that excellent English translations would be available for the entire series for the first time.

Either way, I'll continue looking forward to the new book alongside everyone else, with the knowledge that I'll actually be able to read it one day. :)
1/12/2018 12:46 AM